T-minus Two Days:

I'm not exactly worried. All the stains on my bed prove nothing. Though I must say, the shit luck continues, as the sickness I had a couple of weeks ago has come back. And this time, it's developed into a chest infection.

The doctor says if I don't finish the anti-biotics this time, it's probably going into full blown pneumonia, complete with SARS like symptoms. That'll be a good way to scare the mates.

As Jamie Oliver says, "They're takin' a piss up every conceivable orifice I have in my body."