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Archives 2004-03-22 - 5:36 a.m.


The thing about being a pilot for a big airline is that there will obviously be the standard questions which you answer. Some of which, not listed by alphabetical or dumbassedness order, can be found here:

Q - "Isn't it great to travel all over the world?"

A - "Sometimes. But many days away from home."

Q - "So do you have a limo that picks you up before every flight?"

A - "Unfortunately, not."

Q - "Are you guys like all rich or something?"

A - "No, I still live with my mother, and my 29 other siblings."

Q - "I heard you guys are drunk all the time. Is that true?"

A - "Yes, most of the time. In fact, I'm drunk now ma'am."

Q - "How's sex in the washroom?"

A - "How's sex in a closet?"

Q - "Do you do it with the flight attendants all the time?"

A - "Oh for sure. By the way, isn't your mother a flight attendant?"

Q - "So, when you..."

A - "Just shut up before I put you in the ejection seat and press the 'FIRE' button, okay?"

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