"Good luck, and don't forget to wear your underwear tomorrow."

Day 59

As I sit in this virtual hell that is insomnia (I knew this would happen), I looked up.

On the ceiling, a rather obese cockroach happened to be sitting there, wishfully willing its time away. What do cockroaches do anyway? Do they spend their entire lives intimidating humans, because we like to trample them to death? Or is it the other way around, that we are genetically programmed to think that they're ugly as sin, and need to be trampled to death?

Whatever.

I don't know what to do with it, except to stare at it for the next few hours, hoping it will naturally fly itself into the air conditioner's compressor fan. Otherwise, I'd have to take out the "Listless Broom of Forever Banishment", and conduct a brutal self-sponsored eradication program.

Hitherto, I shall be known as the "Puffy the Roachslayer." May millions of fans heap praise upon my soul...