I can do cheese. I really can.

(My idea of a dating service.)

I shall hang on every word you say
Lie there in wait like your fallen prey
You are my dream and my fantasy
I cannot wait until you're my reality
I can send you a million smilies if you like
A message or two in romantic type
Perhaps one day I will know your name
Together forever we will stay

But something's wrong, why do you not answer
Yes I smoke, but it doesn't mean I have cancer
In my profile it says that I'm an alcoholic
Though I don't do drugs, they make you psychotic
You know you love me, so send me a reply
I'm not a psycho, though I'm parked outside
It is a dating service, so don't worry so much
I promise I won't kill you and have you for lunch